Yeah, so this is a LONG, LONG overdue post – sorry for saying I was going to post this about a million times before I actually did.

Alright, guys. Brace yourselves. And prepare to roll your eyes and sigh, or whatever you do when you realise the Elm’s done it again.

I, err, have a boyfriend.

Remember Aspen? If not, read every single post from this category because I’m a lazy twat and yeah…

I’m nervous of your reactions, not that I should be. You’ve seen me through it all – a lot of you have – remember Ash, Birch and Palm? Har har.

In one of my previous posts, I said “I’m not in love with Aspen. Yet.”

Ohhh, Elm, you’re SUCH a liar. Is it possible for feelings to grow this quickly? I think yes, though it’s difficult NOT to second guess myself.

It was actually quite a funny story as to how this came about – and I know it’s sudden, and will come as a shock to some of you, because my signature rushing-into-relationships always ends badly. But I HOPE this is different. You get people who you just know aren’t complete bastards and who WON’T hurt you, because it’s literally not in their nature.

So, he was in Iceland (this was a week and a half ago), and me being a clingy so-and-so, messaged him a lot. And at one point we were talking, and I said “I love talking to you.” And in what we now call the typo of the century, he said “I love you,” and things escalated from there. I said I fancied him, we talked it out, then at about 1 o’clock at night (morning?) we understood we both returned each other’s feelings. And when I say we talked it out, I do mean that; you guys know I’m the type of person to get horrendous insecurities and paranoia.

AND OH MY GOD, the feeling I got then was… Insane. I just don’t know how to describe it. Relief and the feeling you get after the most intense rush of fear has been quelled. Do you get what I’m saying – even I don’t!

I met up with him on Wednesday (a week ago today holy shit) and the Monday that just passed. We met on the internet, but something so amazing – in real life – grew out of that. It’s not awkward and it’s not painful and I don’t have to constantly think of my insecurities. Once, I said that this wasn’t just a faraway dream and I was right.

I can’t help that I’m happy. I won’t say I deserve this after the shit I’ve been through, because that’s pretentious and just no. But what I will say is that I’m glad this has happened.

We haven’t known each other long, but we know each other enough. We’re so comfortable around each other and you know what? These feelings are just as valid as the ones I had for Ash, and can grow to be even more so.

Okay guys, do I show him my blog? I’m scared if I do, but there are just some things he won’t understand about me if I don’t, unless I tell him, but I can’t lie to him. But I’m scared, because…

Some of the posts on here are really horrible. As in scary and messed-up – I’m guessing you know which ones I mean – look up “I’m Facing Up to It”, and “I’ve Snapped”. Do I trust him enough? Yes. But I’m just scared: what if he doesn’t take it seriously? What if he laughs? What if…

Fuck’s sake, what am I saying? We’re talking about HIM here!

Thanks, everyone, for supporting me through it all. I’ve been messed-up over the time I’ve made this blog, but it’s the people on here that have got me through it.

SO, that was the Announcement! I probably made it out to be worse than it was, but there you go. I’m scared of things going wrong, as I always am, but it’s okay. I sometimes think things are moving too fast, but again, I’m me and I know what my limits are and what emotional things I can handle.

I couldn’t lie to you guys. You’re the thing that keeps me holding on sometimes; I’ve been miserable occasionally and your comments make my day. You have no idea how much that means to me, and so, I won’t hide it. I consider you my friends, anyway.

Thank you again; you are truly amazing. And Aspen, if you’re reading this, thanks for putting up with me and trusting me and being wonderful. I love you.

From Elm πŸ™‚

92 thoughts on “THE ANNOUNCEMENT

  1. Elm! I’m so happy for you even though I don’t actually personally know you…. and I hope this relationship will be a long lasting happy filled one! It already sounds so cuteβ™‘β™‘ and Aspen sounds like a very nice guy.

    • He is πŸ˜€ And aww thank you! Honestly, just because you don’t know me well doesn’t mean you can’t be happy for me. Through your blog, I’ve felt like I know you, or maybe just a little part of you, because you’re great.

  2. CONGRATULATIONS! asdfghjkl i’m so excited for you, you can really tell how happy you are and how he makes you feel and thats so fucking amazing! i know this sounds sappy af, but im so like proud of you (it’s so weird to think that you can be proud of someone you don’t know) because you’ve come through so much bad shit with such a good outlook on life and like you aren’t shying away from enjoying it – and good for you! personally, i think do what you want in regards to telling him; you don’t HAVE to and if you want some parts of your life kept private (because this is like a diary, i suppose) then you’re entitled to that; it’s not like you’re keeping things from him or anything it’s just something INTENSELY personal. but he does seem like such a lovely person from what you say so i doubt he’d judge you or anything…if you want to and tell him, then tell him πŸ™‚

    • I’m shrieking in my mind because your comment JUST MADE MY WEEK, thank you! YAY! And being proud of someone you don’t know is PERFECTLY valid; I’m proud of YOU, after all.
      Hmm… I think I might show him. Soon. He IS a genuinely nice person, and I’m not afraid to tell him how I feel.

      • IM SO GLAD! and thank you!
        ooh it’s definitely nice that you’ve found someone you can share this with! i think it will bring you two to like a whole other level of close…IM SO EXCITED! idk like i can literally feel your happiness through the screen its making me all positive πŸ˜€

      • THANK GOD! It’s one of the things I wanted to achieve, y’know. You’re awesome πŸ™‚ Happiness through the screen? YES! Haha!
        (Also I just showed him, his reaction to his codename was PRICELESS)

  3. YAYYY CONGRATS IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! <<so happy I completely ignored punctuation and grammar in that haha!
    About the blog…if it was me I would probably wait a while. I mean, not even my best friends know about my blog, just because it's personal and private to me. Buuuttt, if you want to then certainly go ahead!! Or perhaps wait a few weeks or months to make sure you trust him 100%. Whatever you decide will be fine! I'm so happy for you!xx

    Obviously. Lol. Anyway…
    IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU YAY!!!!! *dances around the room* Elm, you’re happy, I’m happy. And besides, I was hoping it would turn out well with him. I mean, who wouldn’t? πŸ˜‰ I wish you lots of luck and just take it slow, okay? There’s always second helpings! (Don’t you love it when you can incorporate food into a life lesson) YAY AGAIN

  5. Right: this is brilliant news! It can be so hard to find someone who you can act so naturally around; being able to shift your insecurities even a little towards the back of your mind, and to let something – or someone – else take centre stage… That’s impressive. To not be worried about messing up shows that, whether consciously or subconsciously, you recognise that this boy loves you for, well, you, and not the idealistic representation of you. So many boys (not me) see girls as something to brag about, or show off to their friends about. This means that they will make the girl out to have no flaws, which is unrealistic and, frankly, unbelievable. This often leads to boys pressuring girlfriends into fixing any imperfections, which we all possess, to make the image in their head match the real person. The fact that he loves you for you, including all those insecurities and minimal flaws, shows that he isn’t one of those idiotic boys, and that’s something to cherish about him. In regards to showing him your blog, I would say it’s essential. You often mention, directly and indirectly, that this blog is a piece of you; a place where you can share, relax and ask for advice surrounded by friends. If he truly loves you, this blog will only give him an insight into your thoughts, and allow him to see more of the real you; his feelings toward you will not change. Good luck Elm; I hope things work out for you. God knows you deserve it by now. L XX

    • You’re bloody amazing πŸ™‚ Thank you so much for all that. And the ideal girlfriend image thing – I understand that, and it’s UTTERLY ridiculous.
      I’ll update you on the situation about the showing of the blog, but I have to go to bed REALLY early tonight because Belgium tomorrow.

  6. I’m very happy for you, I in all honesty haven’t been keeping up on your post in the last few months, but the ones I have read show that you really do deserve someone who makes you happy and treats you right.

  7. I’m not gonna say you deserve that after all that you’ve been through. Because that’s not the only reason why you do. And everyone deserves something as amazing as that. Nonetheless, I’m happy for you!!!! Hope you have a long and happy relationship! Update us always! Sending my virtual hugs! πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•

  8. YAYYYYYYYYY! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! FINALLYYY! Elm. I’m so happy for you. Truly happy. Because you are such a brilliant, talented, honest, funny, amazing, and

    • whoops.
      wow. okay… let me continue…
      amazing and just plain GREAT person. And I’m really glad you were able to work through all the bad to get to something as exciting as this. You deserve it. You really do. ❀

  9. YAYAYAY! I am so happy for you Elm you deserve it so damn much and I really hope it works out well! πŸ˜€ SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW

  10. OHMYGOD ELM ASDFGHJKL. Okay, first let me come give you the great big hugs!!!! *crushes you like a long-lost puppy* This is AWESOME!!! I’m so so so so SOOOO happy for you, you literally won’t believe it!! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ You just made my entire day because now all I’m gonna think about is how happy you are and how happy I am because of that. I’m just so…. YAAAYYYY!!! *jumps up and down* Love you forever, Elm. You deserve ALL the happiness out there — you deserve it, you deserve it, you deserve it. Muah! ❀

      • Lol, anytime, darling! πŸ˜‰ I’m just really so very happy for you; I’m probably happier than even you are, you know. *more hugs*

        I think it’ll probably do you good to show him your blog in a while, but since this place is where you pour out all your heart freely, it’s like a personal online diary, so it really depends on how much you trust him. Think about it before you decide, okay? Remember, there are so many of us overprotective mama bears looking out for you. ❀

      • Hehe, YES, you’re a mama bear aww! I know you’d find a way to come to England and kick his arse if he hurt me πŸ˜€

  11. I recommend you wait a while before showing him the blog. Make sure you get to know each other more first and that you completely trust him. Just how i would personally do it though.

  12. Those first few weeks of a new relationship are just amazing, when you can’t stop smiling because you’re just so so happy that you’re with that person. I wish you all the good luck in the world that this is a relationship that lasts and brings you immense amounts of joy πŸ™‚

  13. Oh. My. Gosh! ELM!!!! This is the best way to start my day! I’m so glad you’re happy! Elm, I just want you to know that I pray you find happiness every day, and when you wrote this, I was like, ‘Oh my gosh! Prayers answered!’ Congrats and lots of hugs from Florida!
    And yeah, I think in a bit of time you should show him your blog. Because I think that he will better understand you if he can read it, he can understand how to support you and how to make you happy.
    Again congrats, love ya!!! ❀

  14. AH THIS IS ADORABLE! Don’t say you don’t deserve it, you deserve all of it and more after all you’ve been through. Guys are just trouble, but Aspen sounds great for you! And as for telling him about the blog, I’d wait a little, and if everything is going well then I’d say go ahead! Ah this is so exciting! XD

  15. Hehe OMG this is so EXCITING! Though not going to lie, I guessed it would be this when you said you had an announcement πŸ˜‰ hey, I’m so happy for you Elm! And look at you, guys falling over themselves to go out with you, you flirt! I’m crazy excited for you, this is amazing! xxx

  16. ELM!!!! This is the best thing in the world! I am soooooo happy for you! Seriously, you have no idea how excited I am now! CONGRATS, CONGRATS, CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU DESERVE THIS AND SO MUCH MORE!!!!!!! ELM!!!!!! I can’t even form coherent thoughts. Just. AHHHHH! Cow. Seven. MOOO! Oink! YAYY!!!! THere we go! I found it!!! YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!!!! Just remember to invite me to your wedding! I’ll comment again later once I calm down!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!! YAY!!!!! Okay, this can’t be over yet. I feel sort of hollow (literally) on the inside because I can’t express my joy for you So don’t read this, read all the other amazing comments you deserve this SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!

    • This is the most beautiful and most amazing thing I’ve ever read!!!!! Yaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy you are amazing, and what do you mean, I will always read your comments!!! NIKKIIII AAAAHHH I LOVE YOUYUUU! Your comments are the best thing I can’t even. Bloody hell!!!!!!

  17. I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! You deserve to be happy after all of the bad times you have had. About the blog though if I was you I would wait for awhile to tell him.

  18. OHMAGASH ELMMM CONGRATSSSS IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! Even though I’ve known you for a little while I really think you deserve to be happy πŸ™‚ and do tell him about the blog- if he really loves you he wouldnt give a shit, and if anything it would help you see if he deserves you or not. Plus, you can’t deny him the pleasuse of reading your superbly addictive posts!

      • Yep, I hereby grant you the Superbly Addictive Award (that really should be a thing tho).
        Et de rien, Elminouchette (that would be your French nickname if you were like French i guess)

        I really need to work on this idea (I mean well I’m not nearly popular enough in the blogosphere to create a new award but idgaf tbh)
        And I promise I’ll make it as original as can be.
        (it’s also a given that you’ll be the first winner πŸ˜€ )

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