Something like Love

This is just a rambling post, written by someone who’s had little sleep and feels mildly ill. However, I think that this state can produce the best kind of content (or what my version or “content” is at least).

Recently, I told a good friend that I loved them.

“You know I love you, right? Not like that but I still love you.” It was the most truthful thing I’d said in weeks, something I meant with everything I had and it terrified me more than anything. It left me feeling free, like a weight I didn’t even know existed had been lifted. Even so, it took a lot out of me, expressing what I felt so plainly.

When I said “love”, I meant that I loved them as a friend – in a platonic sense. Now, I don’t feel as if I have the capacity to love romantically; I feel so torn up and tired by myself that the thought of someone else, like that, makes me so weary that I have no energy left. But this was easier. Somehow, telling someone that I loved them in friendship made me more giddy than if I had told someone that I loved them in any other sense.

I think that my friend took in what I said to him and it’s given me so much courage. I’m always afraid to tell people how I feel, even in a platonic sense like that but I think it can be really good for you. Not only does it show you that you can be open with people but it also lets your friends know that you appreciate them a hell of a lot. Everyone needs to be told how much they mean to another person once in a while – even me with my stone cold heart. I took that step and yes, it’s a small one but it helped both of us to understand each other more.

Love comes in so many different forms that it can be hard to distinguish between them. Sometimes it’s not as clear-cut as saying a simple “I love you,” but saying those three words can somehow convey all of that. Maybe that only makes sense to me but it’s as if the emotion in your voice can display that entangled yet simplistic emotion. To me, they have power: it’s how you say it, how you can prove to someone that you care about them. I still have that fear of screwing up how I’ll say things but telling someone I loved them is the first step to conquering that fear. I want to continue doing it so that the next time I tell someone how I feel about them, I don’t get that terrified leap in my chest because previously, those words had scared me beyond belief.

When you feel like it, tell one of your friends that you love them. It can be for something they’ve done or just because they’re a great person. Even if you’re scared, the good thing about friends is that they’ll understand in which way you mean it. There’s little danger of them shoving you away or telling you, “I don’t feel the same way.” That’s why this kind of love doesn’t panic me so much.

Friends stay with you; I know this even for how paranoid I get. They are beautiful and the love I feel for my friends isn’t tainted by terror or the thought that they could never love me back. They do. That’s one of the things of which I’m certain.

To all of you, you mean so much to me. I’d happily tell you I care about you because you listen, take in my words and then you make something of them. The content that people in the blogging world create is wonderful because it’s so incredibly diverse and that’s another reason why I care about the people who’s posts I read.

Remember: love doesn’t always have to be about romance. It’s scary to tell a friend that you love them but if you do, you’re just expressing your friendship. That’s beautiful and you aren’t being overly-emotional. You can love a friend just as much as you love anyone else.

Love is still love, no matter what form it takes.

From Elm πŸ™‚

24 thoughts on “Something like Love

  1. Your life is full of these acts of bravery and then the bold step of sharing them. You have the gift of honest writing and a complex relationship with words that transcends what anyone could merely say. Thank you for your bravery and for your beauty.

    • This comment has made my day light up and I appreciate that so much. It means a lot that you enjoy my writing and take things from it – that you are able to articulate your thoughts in such a way as to make people smile. Thank you!!

  2. I think there are lots of different types and layers of love. I say I love a lot of people, a lot of the time, openly and freely, and some people might think that I’m robbing that word of its meaning, but I think it’s quite the opposite, I say it with the meaning of “you mean a lot to me and I appreciate you”. And that there, too me anyway, is a strong thing to say.

    • It’s one of the strongest things you CAN say. Thanks for your powerful words πŸ™‚ I say “Love you” to a lot of people now too, now I have the confidence.

      • I actually really like telling people I love them because seeing the way their eyes light up in response makes me so happy.

  3. That’s so right!! You know, in my school, only some groups of friends tell each other they love each other, but they don’t seem really convincing to me, perhaps they just wanna show. I don’t know.
    I’ve told some friends I love them, and yeah, it doesn’t have to be in a romantic way, if you tell your parents you love them, it doesn’t mean you have a crush on them LOL
    We shouldn’t be afraid of telling other people how we feel about them, they deserve it!!!
    This was a great post!!! Loved reading it!!
    P.S. I replied to your email. πŸ™‚

    • YAY exactly!!! πŸ™‚ I’m so glad you think so! I just think it’s really important to show appreciation for people and my way of doing that is to tell them I love them.

      P.S: OH GOSH I only just saw!!!! One sec I’ll reply ❀

  4. This is so nice!! I should try doing that more often too. 😊 You know, telling them how much they actually mean. But I guess, I should have earlier? Ah, but atleast from now on I’ll do that. Thanks!! ❀
    Also, how’s Tenerife?

      • 😁😁 That’s great. How long will you be there?
        And I’m okay, I think? I saw a dreadful video which is kinda haunting me. Urgh. πŸ™‚

      • Uhh one about a dreadful Russian game that’s been spreading around the world. I don’t know if you’ve heard of it. It’s called blue whale and the ones who play it commit suicide.
        Urghhh…it makes me shudder.

        And also, when will you be back? 😁

  5. Hey, Elm.
    Let me just stop for a second and appreciate for you being here because, there are so many ways to say ” I love you ” to someone, and Elm, I love you.
    I love you for being real to us… to me. I love your messages, I love how I, the viewer, can feel what you feel just through your words.
    You are the first ever Blogger to ever make me cry.
    I see exactly what you say.
    One time, I told to my best friend Sky: I love you man, I really do.
    And he laughed and said a joke. And it felt so good because that is what we do and maan did that just felt so good. The joke he made was a way to tell me what I just told him, back.
    Thank you Elm, I really appreciate you. πŸ™‚

    • I love you because you know exactly what to say to make me happier. You’ve put a smile on my face and made me blink back tears from your words – you have no idea how much I appreciate that. I love you because you understand me in a way that not many people do – where I’ve shown you, through my posts, how unhappy I can be but you still talk to me. You still respect me. Just – thank you. Thanks for everything.

      Also, I’m so glad to hear about your friend!!! πŸ™‚ I remember reading about him in one of your posts I think xx

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