I woke up this morning, on the 2 and a half-year anniversary of my blog starting, to find out I had 3000 followers.
3000 followers????!!! WHAT?! Since when, since how? After I screamed in shock for about a year, clapped my hands in delight like a child and generally partied alone in my room at 6 AM, I got on with my day in a dignified way. Totally.
I don’t understand how the fuck I’ve somehow accumulated 3000 people/aliens/robots to follow my manic, odd and slightly too-hysterical ramblings. The extra chocolate icing on the chocolate cake was that it’s my 2 and a half blogging anniversary and do I care that no one celebrates that? No, because it’s a thing now and I feel like I’ve received a statistical birthday present.
I know that the amount of followers don’t really matter but I’m sat here flabbergasted at the sheer amount of people who clicked that follow button. I mean that’s more people than are in my school, more people than I know and far more people than I can name. Also, it’s me, with my sporadic posts which are either too angsty for words or screaming about irrelevant topics. Why do people follow me again?!
These 2 and a half years have been such a rollercoaster but they’ve also been amazing and I can really contribute that to the influence my blog has on me. I feel real when I write to you; when I publish a post, it connects me to a small section of the world. Through it, I can help people, help myself and spread as much of my odd brand of positivity as I like. That includes me shouting, “YOU ARE AMAZING!” with it being backed up by some weird, philosophical realisation I have in some corner of my life. If it helps one person that’s great and if it helps 1000, that’s equally as great. If my words can reach you in some capacity, to prove to you you aren’t alone in how you feel, it makes me actually smile.
You’re all incredible. I know I haven’t been the best at replying to posts or comments recently; I’ll freely admit that. You still stick by me, supportive like not many people can be. Whoever you are, whoever’s reading this, you have seen a part of my life and you know me, in however little a way it is. If you’ve got this far, I know that in the tiniest way, you care and you take in my words. Knowing that makes me want to cry those happy little tears you get when you realise that people give a shit about you and the work you do isn’t for nothing.
I have some advice for you. Keep going, whether you have 1 follower, 100 or 10000 or none. These are your words, your thoughts and you are the one with control over them. You can change lives but firstly, you have to believe that you can keep writing and not give up. There’s so much more than numbers: there’re feelings, laughter, smiles and letting people in on however much you want them to know or that you want to share. It’s a kind of literary beauty.
Thank you. Thank you with everything I have, for making me the most myself I can be when I write; thank you for reading and listening and feeling whatever emotions you feel when you think of Elm or anything I write. Thank you for talking to me, for understanding, for being such a complex person that you write your own words and interpret what you read in a different way to everyone else.
Wow, I never would have guessed two years ago that now, I’d still be writing. I’m happy for it; I’m willing and ready to connect with my blog fully again and to make the most out of it. I know you’ll help me in whatever way you can, probably without realising. You’ve already done that for me and that means more to me than I can fathom.
I love you all so much. I have plans for the future – as we all do – and I want my blog to be part of that. I want you to be part of that, whoever you are, because through this blog I can talk to the most beautiful people. Don’t forget that a blog can be more than just a cluster of posts. It can open the world up.
Love from Elm 🙂