It Shouldn’t have been THAT Scary

Aspen – my boyfriend – came over today, which was great because I hadn’t seen him in two weeks. I think I almost cried with laughter at one point, because I’m special like that. The day was fantastic, as things ALWAYS are with Aspen (GUYS remember when I used to write rambling posts about my then shitty love life? Hmm, that makes me sound arrogant).

Dad and I went to drop him off at the train station and as we got out the car, this guy came up to us. He talked to us, and followed us (or just walked) into the train station.

Our train station is tiny, and ALWAYS quiet, and this guy was shouting nearly at the top of his lungs. He was drunk, I could tell, and I think high as well according to my dad. I’m not sure, though.

Some of the things he said where (excuse the language)

“You got a fag?” This was said to my dad about 4 times, and to some other guys up and down the station platform.

“I LOVE CHELSEA!” (As in, the football team) He would also scream “CHELSEA!” whilst clapping his hands. By scream, I mean ACTUALLY screaming.

This was the bit that scared me. “I FUCKING HATE WEST HAM! I’d knife them I would. I fucking hate those-” Yeah and I’m not writing the next word.

Yeah. What also scared me was that he got REALLY close to us, and then he didn’t step away from the edge of the platform when the train came. He was supposed to be on the other platform for. his train, but he kept on going and then coming back to our platform.

At the start, I thought it was… I’m not sure, kind of amusing in a “WHAT’S HAPPENING?” kind of way. I was sat in between Aspen and my dad (holding Aspen’s hand in a death grip yes I’m great like that) but when Aspen left, I kind of got scared. A little.

Both of them were scared he’d get violent – well, so was I. So, dad and I got out the station, and you could still hear him, yelling and clapping and saying the same words, over and over. I don’t really know how to describe it because looking back on my words, it doesn’t seem all that scary. His voice made me feel a little scared, which is dumb because I tried not to judge him, but in the end I was scared.

I think it’s stupid to try and predict what you’d be like in a situation that’s like that, or worse, because you won’t know. You might say you’d be brave, but chances are – like me – you were actually scared that guy was going to hurt you, or get himself hurt or someone else on the platform. It’s awful that I’m saying that because I shouldn’t have really been. scared. As much as I TRIED not to judge him, it was almost impossible and I have to say, I kind of feel sorry for him.

My dad called the transport police on him, so hopefully he’s okay. I wonder what it will be like for him when he wakes up tomorrow, or if this is his life now, or what he thinks. Will he remember it? Is he going to get arrested?

Bottom line is: I was scared. Not so scared as to fear for my own safety on a MASSIVE level, but scared enough that I wanted to get out of there. I have no idea if he looked stereotypical, nor do I care, because he was just a guy and I don’t know his story, but it affected me in some way and I think it’s important to realise that, no matter what, you CAN feel threatened on the quietest of days in the most peaceful places. And that’s not a weakness, or a bad thing, because I admitted to myself that I was scared and it made me feel a little better.

I don’t want to judge the guy. That’s unfair, because I have no idea what he goes through. But when someone is standing in front of you, asking your father the same questions over and over again and then walking off to shout at other people, that kind of logic flies out the window.

Have you ever had experiences like this?

From Elm 🙂