Little Positives

In the rush of life and in the mayhem of everything, I feel like I sometimes – scratch that, always – forget that there are tiny little things I should be proud of myself for doing. It’s so easy to get bogged down with all the huge things you should be doing that we can forget that yes, we’ve done important things but there are also the things that others might overlook. They’re important too; they’re what keep me going.

I saw my Head of Year today and I cried until I felt too hollowed out for words. Seeing her wasn’t as helpful as I’d have liked it to be but she did say something really worthwhile: I’ve done small things recently that are positive. In the pit of negativity I’ve plunged myself into, there are ways of looking at the little bright sparks.

Here’s a list, for you, of a few things that you might not even think are worth mentioning. They’re obvious things but that’s the beauty of it: I’ve done them, I’m still here; I’m still going. That’s what matters.

1. I got out of bed this morning, despite not wanting to.

2. I keep up my skincare routine every day, even when I don’t feel like it, because I know it makes my skin healthy.

3. I read a page of my book for English and when I wanted to give up, I read another page.

4. I spoke to my friends this morning and didn’t make an excuse that I had to do work.

5. I replied to my Twitter messages.

6. I did a little bit of singing a few days ago, just to myself, and felt the smallest thrill of happiness like I hadn’t in a while.

7. I smiled at someone as they walked past; I didn’t even know them but it felt nice.

8. I had an idea for something I might write for the school newspaper and I’m planning to write it down.

9. I didn’t want to disappear much after I cried with my Head of Year.

10. When I got the urge to message someone who’s been messing with my head recently, I didn’t do it.

11. I’m writing this blog post.

12. I have a work plan for this evening – I have an objective.

13. I’m breathing regularly.

14. Things are feeling more real than they usually do.

15. I thought the words “I love you” and didn’t get scared.

If you can take a little inspiration from this; if you can be helped by this or if this makes things feel a little less like everything’s screaming in your head, then it will let me realise that words are as powerful as ever. This list won’t magically help but it’s done a little something for me and maybe, you too. Remember that you aren’t a superhero and every single little thing you do that makes you go “Oh, I’m still going” is worthwhile. Those little achievements are impressive because you’ve completed them and only you know what that means to you.

Don’t sweep over things just because they’re small. They’re still relevant; they’re still things you’ve done. Those little things are what you should be proud of yourself for. I’m certainly proud of you, for simply carrying on as yourself and doing the smallest things which build you up, day by day.

When you start to feel down, maybe have a go at creating a list like I’ve done. It helps to show yourself what you’ve achieved and how you can move forward.

Keep going. You’re not invincible but neither are you someone who gives up, no matter what you tell yourself. Small things can make you stronger, bit by bit. You aren’t stupid for cherishing the little moments. You should smile at yourself for them.

Love from Elm 🙂

Why I Love Me Tag!

I’m a culprit of disliking myself sometimes. I find ways to criticise parts of my personality, without restembering that there’s plenty that I do actually love about me. So, this tag – created by Tash is perfect to remind me.

Thank you so much for nominating me, you beautiful human. You honestly brighten up my day because you know exactly how to make me feel better: you spread positivity, something that all of us need right now. Creating this tag is just the start of that positivity.

The Rules:
1. Post the award on your blog
2. Acknowledge the blogger who nominated you
3. Leave a link to the original tag creator (ThoughtfulTash) to get a bit more info about WHY this tag has been created!
4. Write 10 things you love about YOURSELF and WHY
5. Nominate at least 5 other bloggers
6. In the comments of the blog post, spread more self-love with compliments to each other!

WHY I LOVE ME:
1. My laugh
I love how varied it is. My quiet laugh is soft; when I try to stop myself from laughing it turns into a wheezing giggle and the best part of my laugh is when I lose control of it. I sort of screech and can’t stop; I love it because it makes other people smile and makes me feel unaccountably happy. It’s neither restrained nor forced.

2. My weird phrases
As the people who have spent enough time around me will know, I sometimes come out with the weirdest things. It’s part of what makes me me – I’ve said “Awww diddums!” too many times recently; “Ohh nooo I feel so sorry for you your life is so hard oh dear” in the most dead and sarcastic voice ever; I’ve also said “I’m going to burn your house down!” even though I’m scared of fire. It’s an original part of my personality and isn’t changed by anyone: it’s the true me and when I say things like that, I know I’m utterly being myself and not hiding behind anyone else. Also, they’re just funny to say and it shows I don’t care about what people think of me.

3. My singing voice
This is another thing that hasn’t been changed by other people. My voice is strong and I can hit the notes in my register: it’s improved and I love singing so much. The main thing I love about it is that I’ve retained my accent; even if it makes words harder to sing, I almost sing how I speak. It makes me feel more genuine because I’m not trying to put anything on and I know I’m not faking anything.

4. My writing style
I have a great vocabulary and I can utilise that to express my feelings. My writing flows naturally: I can tell when to be formal and informal. I also know how to help people with my writing because for me, writing goes hand in hand with helping.

5. My kindness
Whatever happens, I always strive to be kind to people. Even if they’ve been awful to me or hurt me, I’ll always try to be the bigger person. I know that I’d always lend a hand to literally anyone that needs it: I feel positively about my personality for it.

6. How I look after my health
I may not do much exercise but I look after my skin and body – I do stretches because my muscles are tight and I wash my face every day, as well as having a routine. It makes me feel positive and grounds me in place if that makes sense – I love it because I’m taking control of a part of my life.

7. My love of books
I love all types of books: fantasy, historical fiction, science fiction – anything. When I talk about books, I feel happy and become animated; I could rant about a good book for years. In fact, I’ve been known to cry because of how happy a book has made me. People don’t see this side of me often but when it does come out, I go into full fangirl mode and it makes me grin.

8. My hair
Though I don’t have a perception of what the colour is, I’m told it’s a lovely shade of brown. It’s thick, going down to my mid-back and when I brush it, it feels so smooth – it’s naturally straight too. I love it because it’s something that I’ve never criticised: feeling it being blown by the wind is a glorious feeling and brushing it calms me down.

9. My music
Not only do I love how I don’t restrict myself in my music taste, I love how I can write songs. When I get inspiration, everything just fits together: I know how to get my meaning across in lyrics; it’s a form of poetry to me. I combine art and writing well and I know I’m good at it: I won’t sell myself short.

10. My dedication to my blog
Through all the turbulance of life, I’ve kept to this blog. Even when I felt like giving up, I persevered – I really admire that about myself. I never stopped and never truly wanted to; it’s something I love with all my heart.

My nominations:
1. Lu

2. Cheyenne

3. Kate

4. Aspen

5. Mahriya

I hope you enjoy doing this and spread the love, everyone! You’re all brilliant. Never criticise yourself for something that other people adore about you.

From Elm 🙂

The 2016 Blogger Awards – Update!

With two weeks to go until the results are announced for the 2016 Blogger Awards – which I’m hosting, I’ve finally caught up with all the nominations. It took me forever, but now I’ve noted down almost all of the people that are nominated so far.

There’s an emphasis on so far, because there are still two weeks left in which to nominate people. The posts and comments I’ve already seen are truly lovely; I’ve never been so cheered up because of the love and positivity that’s been shared. Reading what you have to say about each other has put a smile on my face; through this, I’ve got to know so many new blogs and that’s one of the reasons I’m so pleased to be hosting this.

To find out what these awards are about if you don’t know already, and to check out the rules, you can read this post. If you already know, then here’s a little reminder (because I know I’d forget if I wasn’t thinking about it)

• The deadline (that’s a slightly scary word but don’t let that put you off) for submitting nominations is on the 30th of December
• Results will be posted on the 31st (my birthday coincidentally)
• You have to either link your post back to my post when nominating, or tag it with the tag 2016bloggerawards
• Every blog is worth an award, not just the ones that are nominated or that win

So, get nominating! You don’t have to nominate people for every single category; just do your best and remember to have fun with it! It’s not a competition; it’s just a way to give more positivity to you and the world.

Spread the word if you like, and I hope you have an amazing holiday whether you celebrate Christmas, something else or nothing at all.

From Elm 🙂

Guest post – a pledge to positivity.

First of all, I am over the moon that Elm has agreed to let me write a post for this blog – thank you so much!

When deciding what to write I was lingering in this peculiar melancholy state. I felt somewhat oblivious from everything – I was far-flung, a thousand miles away. Thus I decided to dedicate this post as a pledge to positivity.

I’ve always tried to live my life as pragmatic as I could, especially going through school and other challenges your adolescent years have to offer. And just the same, I’ve tried to encourage those around me to always look on the bright side and always be the best version of them. But sometimes we can get lost, loose our buoyancy and the sudden plunge into a deep sea catches us off guard. And it can be hard to find a way to the surface once more.

However there are a few healthy habits and thoughts I’ve discovered to unfasten the desolation and to maintain a positive mindset.

Firstly, I feel as though it is cardinal to stress that positivity is not always adjacent to happiness. They aren’t particularly the same thing. Although obviously happiness can stem from being positive. However the two don’t exactly have to marry up. You may be feeling at your worst, but there’s always a lighter side to it – although this may not clear the air completely for you, it could lift some weight away which is better than before.

If you have studied philosophy you may be aware of the theory of light and darkness. Without getting too into it, this isn’t a philosophy lesson, it challenges the problem of evil by saying like darkness is just the absence of light, evil is the absence of good. And this correlates well with this idea of positivity. Sometimes there is an absence of good, which is always something which can be turned around – sometimes you just need to step out of the shade into the light.

This next habit/process is one I found hard, and I know people I have spoke to have found difficult, however is completely doable. And that is catching yourself in the moment. As humans we can happily go along in this conscious coma as I like to call it, unaware of ourselves. However by recognising these waves and then moving from them can truly build you as a person. I really don’t exaggerate when I say it is pivotal for me being more forward looking and sanguine! Nonetheless, it is something which is found tricky to get into. And unfortunately I am not psychiatrist and have no real methodology around it.

There are also some everyday things which let you engage with yourself as a person, ergo exemplifying this positive state. If you look online there are hundreds of thousands, but here are some of my favourites which I believe have actually helped me:

  • Drinking more water
  • Writing
  • Going on a walk
  • Meditation
  • Playing/listening to music
  • Reading
  • Socialising
  • Colouring

Although those are very general things, you’d be surprised at how they can really develop you!

There are also many mindfulness apps nowadays which I personally can do with or without (basically the voices annoy me…) but I know some friends of mine and a doctor really favour them!

This is becoming quite a hefty post so I shall leave it there. Big thank you again to Elm for this and I hope you’ve liked this little reflection post from me! I am also trying to get back into blogging more and engage with more people on the internet – make some internet friends aha!

Em x